Bleacher Laps: Feeling the Burn

I've been working out pretty hard trying to get back into shape.  I've been playing with the same 4 or 5 lbs for the last week or two, so I decided to mix things up a bit and hit the bleachers for some bleacher laps intermixed with walking around the track while my oldest son worked with his track throwing coach.

I put in 6 bleacher laps and a mile around the track before the 90 degree F weather finally caught up with me and I had to stop. I think I worked out for a good 45 minutes in the sun.

The interesting thing I noticed as I was working out was that my lungs never got to that point where I was gasping for breath.  The majority of my effort was in the legs.  They were burning and cramping something fierce.

Yes, I was doing stairs.  And yes, I stayed hydrated.  An interesting tidbit about being so severely overweight is that underneath all of that fat (at least there is for me) there's a bunch of muscle already.  You NEED that muscle to heft around all this extra weight.

For example, halfway through my bleacher laps, an athletic guy showed up and started running the bleachers.  Good for him!  He's in shape and he's putting forth an effort.  And one day I hope to be running the bleachers just like him.  The difference right now, though, is that I'm traversing the bleachers with 20 lb weights on each leg.  20 lbs of FAT covering the muscle I possess.  With each step, I must lift that extra 20 lbs.

Consider this for a moment.  How far do you think that same man (or a women) would get with a 160 lb person on their back?  Would they be able to run very far before they get winded, or body parts begin to ache?  Could they even do the bleacher laps with someone on their back? That's what it's like for me.  I'm an athletic person with 160 lbs of dead weight hanging off my body. And until I lose that weight, my muscles will constantly be burning and aching, slowly lessening as ounce by ounce, that dead weight is burned into nothingness.

So, this morning, when I began to walk down the stairs and felt my quads screaming in agony, I smiled.  Because for the first time since I began, I was feeling a GOOD pain.  Lactic acid had built up and my body was building more muscle.

I have surpassed the hardest part of the 'torture' phase of my weight loss faster than anticipated.  Now I can begin the burn & build stage:  Burn the fat and build the muscle.  Yes!!!!!

 

How I survived a Weekend Out of Town Without Completely Trashing My Diet

OK, let's get one thing straight right off the bat.  I still gained weight. But, I'm not set back two  week's worth of dieting because of a weekend out of town. Meh.

But when the dust settled, and I weighed myself, I was only up 2.9 lbs, which in my estimation is friggin' FANTASTIC considering I had to eat out THREE MEALS per day, and couldn't work out. So let me tell you about my weekend.

My oldest son had a basketball camp in Montana, and we decided to go watch him play.  The weekend consisted of 6 hours of driving and 6+ games.  When we originally made the reservations for the hotel, we chose a basic hotel without a swimming pool with the understanding that just my husband would go and I'd stay home with the little kids.  At the last minute, Nate expressed interest in having me come support him and I willingly agreed.

So, off we went on a little family trip to watch big brother play basketball.  When we walked into the hotel room, we discovered that not only was there no pool, but there was no mini-fridge or microwave. There was no means of food prep or fresh food storage.  Ugh! Time to get creative.

In the past, the whole trip would be a catastrophe from the moment we got in the car. Snacks would be junk food and pop, consumed on the go until we stopped for fast-food along the way.  This time around, I had a bottle of water and a couple handfuls of trail mix.

Dinner was a grilled chicken sandwich from Wendy's and anther bottle of water. It was the best option considering the circumstances.

We stopped by the grocery store for food when we got to town, but what are your options when there's no fridge or microwave?  So I picked up a case of bottled water and some grapes for myself, juice for the kiddos.

To spare you the boring list of foods I ate, I'll just say that some choices were good and some choices were bad (obviously, otherwise I wouldn't have gained weight!).  But, it was progress from past trips, and I managed to consume almost zero soda pop, which is huge for me!

 I have several weekends this summer that will require me being out of town.  And now I have a baseline. The goal will be to make each trip better than the last until it no longer affects my weight and I can make the best possible food choices even when I'm away from home.

So tell me, what do you do to stay on track when you go out of town?  I'd love to know so I can use them for myself next time!

Sometimes You Just Have to Pull Your Big Girl Panties and DO IT!

Yeah, it was one of those days.  I started the day FANTASTIC.  But somewhere between picking up messes, teaching a class at church, and work, I lost all motivation.  Oh, and the 5 friggin' brownies I ate for lunch.  Yeah, that was all I had. Brownies.  My body rewarded me by being sick for the rest of the night (serves me right).  I've had issues with chocolate ever since my 4th child was born.  It upsets my stomach.  Does that stop me? Nope.  I'm a woman for Pete's sake!  The only thing I desire more than chocolate is pizza.  And we've already had that conversation. :(

So, when 9:00 pm (my designated work out time) came and went, then 10:00 turned to 10:30pm I realized I had to make a decision.  Was I going to put my big girl panties on and do what had to be done? Or was I gonna wuss out and go to bed instead?

Yep.  I got off my sorry butt and worked out.  Not only that, but I added .2 mph to my speed, another 12 minutes (almost 50% longer than yesterday) to my time, and doubled my distance - 2.7 miles.  Not bad considering I started at 1/2 a mile a couple weeks ago. 

Any bets on what my weight loss will be in the morning??  I'm hoping karma will reward me by ignoring those stupid brownies today. 

Week 2 Weigh In: 4 Things I Can Do To Make This Next Week's Weigh-In Phenominal

Week 2 weigh in:

I'm getting mixed signals this week.  Admittedly, this was NOT my best week, though it often takes me a week or two to acclimate myself.  I'm not good at cold turkey.

But this weigh in, even for me, is pretty bad.

Instead of losing weight, I ultimately gained it.    My fat content went up .5%,but my water went down .8%

I lost inches in my bust, upper abs, and hips. But I stayed the same for every other body part.

I think what frustrates me the most is that most of the time, my first week is rewarded with a 5 lb weight loss.  But this time around I gained .8 lbs.

This can be attributed to many things.  It could be that I'm actually gaining muscle, or possibly water weight (though my water weight and muscle percentages tell me otherwise).  Or, it could mean something as simple as the fact that I need to take a good ol' fashioned dump.  .8 lbs could mean a myriad of things.  And I don't have the time to obsess over bad results.

All I can do is concentrate on what I am going to do to ensure I have a FANTASTIC week this next time around.

So this is what I plan to do:

1) Do NOT skip a single work out day.  I skipped a couple this week due to illness or pain.  But, you know what?  There are enough work-out programs out there that even if I'm sick or in pain, there is SOMETHING I can do to burn some calories and ramp up my metabolism.  It's time to be more flexible and rely less on walking and more on moving.

2) NO PIZZA. (Note: I didn't say eat less.  I said eat different) Pizza is the bane of my existence.  It's the go-to food for my family.  When I'm not up for cooking, that's usually what the hubby or kids request.  But every stinking time I eat pizza, my pounds are up the next day.  Goal for this week:  NO PIZZA - at ALL. Period. End of discussion. In order for me to meet my health & fitness goals, I must learn to control my cravings.

3) Drink More Water.  I was trying to drink 8 glasses per day.  Nope.  We're going for 12.  Maybe I need to flush my system out to start the ball rolling.  Heaven knows, extra water certainly won't hurt!

4) Add a little more exercise to the program.  Yes, walking is good.  But apparently it's not good enough, when you're not losing weight.  I do have a secret weapon I'm implementing this week. If all goes well, I'll explain exactly what I did so you can do the same if you want.

My sisters often tease me about it, and my husband notices within a day or two that I've started it.  But well...you'll understand when I tell you about it.  IN A WEEK!  So check back often!!!  You'll be amazed at the changes in me in just a WEEK.  Seriously.

First Day on the Trails. I Think I Almost Died.

Me after the work out. Beet Red!

My sweet husband woke up this fine Saturday morning and asked me what my plans were.  I told him I had a bit of work to do, and then I wanted to take a walk.  He then told me he'd been planning on going on a walk to and asked if we could go now.

I dropped what I was doing and put on some shoes (I was already in work-out clothes to help motivate me to get my butt out of the house...eventually).

We headed over to the trails that follow the Spokane River for our walk. He asked how far I wanted to go, and I told him my hope was to go 3 miles.  Yeah, I know it's not far, but it is when I stop at a mile on the treadmill.

Walking always seems to take three times longer on a treadmill. Blech!

I was able to get about a mile into my walk before my back was screaming, my hands were so swollen I couldn't make a fist, and my calves were beginning to cramp up, and my hips hurt.  Oh, how I love the beginning weeks of losing weight.  NOT!!

The start of a massive blister. Isn't it pretty? I shall name it Henry

KC asked me if we needed to turn back and I promptly told him NO!  I will finish this walk even if I have to stop 30 times and I'm crawling to the car! Little did he know how close to the truth that may be.

The nice thing, as he pointed out, about walking the trails vs. a treadmill, is that on the trails you must turn around and walk back.  You HAVE to walk back.  You don't have a choice, unless you want to die there on the trails. With a treadmill, you can get tired and step off and be done.

When we got to our half-way point, I had to stop and rest my back for about 5 minutes.  My boobs and stomach are too big!  It was hurting my back too much - if felt very much akin to labor pains.

So I sat down, relieved the pressure on my back, the stood up.  KC asked if I needed more time and I told him, "This is as good as I'm ever gonna feel, so we might as well get started."

My fingers are so swollen they look like stuffed sausages!

I did pretty good for the first 1/2 mile, then the pain in my back commenced again, followed by my hands (from the swelling), then my shins, calves, quads, and hips.  KC very nicely slowed his pace as I adjusted my stride, and quietly endured the experience through gasps of air.

It wasn't pretty, but I finished without having to stop, and I have the start of only one major blister on my left heel to show for the experience.

I came home with my face beet red, my shirt covered in sweat marks, and my fingers tingling from lack of sensation. There were moments I felt like I was going to die of a heart attack, or pass out from hyperventilation.  But I also came home with a sense of accomplishment.  The fist step is often the hardest, and today was no exception.  Working out at 295 lbs is no easy task, but as long as I persist - remembering that at this point it is merely a war of the wills - I will succeed and it will get better until working out is eventually fun.  It will EVENTUALLY become something I look forward to and crave.

Let the Epic Games Begin! First official Day of my Weight Loss

30 minutes on the treadmill feels like an hour on the trails!!

As of this morning (Sunday the 17th), I'm weighing in at 296.2, which is already a loss of 7.2 lbs.  But the weight lost up until this point has been due to sporatic attempts to be or eat healthier.  Today is what I would call my official "Day 1" because I'm journaling my food and working out. 

I like starting on Sundays because I don't eat out on Sundays, which forces me to eat healthy(er) and allows me a little more time to focus on myself before jumping head first into my week.

So just a couple quick heads-ups for those who either don't know me, or have never had this much weight to lose: 

1)  I have little or no filter.  I think filtering this experience gives a person a false sense of simplicity when it comes to losing weight of this proportion and to leave out the undesirable components of my weight for the sake of the 'eww' or 'TMI' responses keeps those who are struggling with the same issues as I am from feeling isolated because they won't identify completely with my experience.  So, for those who are faint of heart, be warned.  And if you find a particular post disturbing I'll tell you a secret:  You can delete it!  I'll never know and nobody will tell.  Just come back the next day to when things are normal :)

This is what I concentrate on while I'm on the treadmill.  Hundreds of motivational quotes!

2) I can get a little hard core at times.  I have an all-or-nothing personality. This means that in order for me to successfully lose 160 lbs I will need to be 100% all of the time.  I cannot fudge.  Not working out even ONCE will cause me to fail.  This is a personality flaw.  I understand this.  And it has taken me years to come to grips with it.  If you are NOT all-or-nothing, that's OK.  But this is who I am.  Thus, there will be lots of posts on some days because I tend to obsess on occasion to stay focused on the end goal. 

3) I will NOT be following any specific diet.  They are too restrictive.  However, I can say that of the weight loss programs I have used (and I've used nearly all of them), I will probably adhere closest to the 6-week-body makeover, which is what I was using 6 years ago when I lost 80 pounds.  I would have succeeded in that program if I hadn't gotten pregnant half way through and forced to stop.  

I am not following any specific diet, but am instead choosing to take bits and pieces that have worked for me and incorporating them all into a method that I will be able to maintain indefinitely.  The problem with diets is that they are temporary.  I am looking for a way of living that will be permanent.  Nothing less.  I have NO intention of regaining this weight back. Ever. 

4) I will be eating a LOT.  Why? Because it requires a lot of food to maintain a body this size.  So, a normal person might be on a 12-1500 calorie diet to lose 2 lbs a week.  Me?  I'm on an 1800+ calorie diet and I'll be losing nearly a pound a DAY.  Never fear, though.  The smaller I get, the less I'll be eating - in spite of the increased exercise.

Starting my Journey of a 160 pound weight loss TODAY...OK I started a week ago.

Did you miss me? I missed you.  I missed the time I spent working out, feeling great, and losing weight.  

What happened to me, you ask?  Well it's simple really.  My daughter got sick.  No, not cough cough sick.  More like, You've got a giant hole in your heart and you're going to stroke-out and die so you'd better get that fixed kind of sick.  Yeah.  So losing weight got derailed for about 4 or 5 months until she had her surgery.

  During that time I had several epiphanies (I'll leave those stories for later).  But most importantly, I realized that the crap is ALWAYS going to be hitting the fan for me.  And I'm ALWAYS going to be busy.  So, it's time to suck it up and get to work.  Nothing will change unless I make it change and make my health a priority. 

In the mean time, I'll give you an update and my new starting point.  This picture is my most recent of me - at 300 lbs.  Yep.  I finally broke that blasted barrier (and cried).  I see so much of my mother in me now (again, a story for another time) and I don't want to be my mother.  At least not in the weight department. 

 Now, I have close to 160 lbs to lose.  Believe you me.  I know how next to impossible that sounds.  But I also know what I'm made of.  And I know what this journey is going to require in order to be successful.  And I'm up for the challenge.  And the humiliation (I'll be posting VIDEOS this time!) 

Needless to say, stay in touch.  My baby is better, and I'm back on track. I've already lost 6 lbs (I started a week ago - seriously).  So now, it's time to document the crap out of my journey.  I hope someone gets something out of my weight loss journey.  Even if it IS just me.


Yep. This is gonna be EPIC!

286.6 lbs. This is gonna suck....to put it nicely.

Quote for the day: 

Yeah, so today sucked.  I knew it would.  It always does at the beginning.  But I'd forgotten how much it was going to suck.

I am 286.6 lbs.  I'm beyond overweight.  I'm beyond obese.  I'm morbidly obese.  If they had a term worse than that, I'd be it.  I have 150 lbs I need to lose in order to hit the middle of what is considered a healthy weight range for my body.  One hundred and fifty.  Pounds.  Not ounces.  POUNDS.  That means I have to burn 525,000 calories to hit my goal weight, or do 1,050,000 jumping jacks.

People like me land magazine covers if we actually achieve weight loss.  That's how rarely this goal is accomplished.

Let me give you a visual. THIS is 100 lbs of fat.  I need to lose 1 1/2 times this amount to hit a healthy weight.

OK.  Enough wo-is-me's. 

Like I said before.  I knew this would suck.  I've lost 80 lbs before - about 5 years ago just before I found out I was pregnant with my 3rd child.  6 months after she was born, I wound up pregnant with my fourth.  And now, 4 years later, I'm just now getting around to getting back on the wagon.  And I'm right back where I started the first time. (sigh). 

For those of you who aren't in my situation, let me tell you a few things about what it's like to be this fat.  It sucks. It not unusual for me to lose sensation in my fingers and hands.  I get winded walking up the stairs, or even going any real distance.  I can't sleep well because my hips hurt from the weight of my body when I sleep on my side, I feel like there is a 25 lb weight on my chest when I sleep on my back, and my back hurts when I sleep on my stomach.  Absolutely nothing looks good.  I have a hard time tying my shoes.  And we won't even begin to go into the horrors of shopping for clothes at this weight. 

Back to today.  I finally got my butt off the chair and hit the treadmill.  A few months ago, I was able to do about 45 minutes at 2.0 incline and 3.5 mph.  Today, I did 8 minutes.  8 freakin' minutes. 

At 3 minutes, I was winded.  At 6 minutes, my lower back was screaming at me.  At 7 minutes, I had both hands on the side rails bending over to relieve the stress on my back, hoping to push through.  And at 8 minutes, I had to get off.  

I'd forgotten how hard that extra 10-15 pounds is at this weight.  Walking is pure torture until I reach about 270 lbs.  But, whining and complaining doesn't burn calories.  I made my bed and now I've got to sleep in it - irregardless of whether or not its comfortable, or even torturous.  This is the price I must pay for being irresponsible with my weight and my health.  

My goal for tomorrow:  No soda and 15 minutes on the treadmill.  Wish me luck.  I'm gonna need it.  :(