Susan's Epic Weight Loss: Up 2 lbs. Thanks Aunt Flo!!

Yep, It's official.  I hate periods.  I weight myself today and I'm up 2 lbs.  I know. I KNOW.  I'm not supposed to weigh every day because there are usually fluctuations.  But I'm not that kind of girl.  When I weigh myself and see the numbers go up, I will instinctively work harder, or watch my portions more religiously.  And that's a good thing, right?

So, when I saw the 2 pound weight gain, even though I know it's probably from water retention due to Aunt Flo, I upped my water to 12 glasses, hit the treadmill, watched my food portions (no dessert, or garlic bread), and generally stayed out of trouble.  And according to MyfitnessPal, I've only consumed 1350 calories, which to a normal person would be fine, but for someone my size is darned near starvation - especially when the program says I burned 500 calories exercising/walking today.

I was only able to walk a mile and put in 18:39 minutes of walking before the lower back pain was unbearable - kind of like the sciatic nerve running down the butt and legs, but I'm determined to add more time each day.  Plus I upped my speed and resistance a bit to offset the lack of time I could put in.  If I can only work out 20 minutes, by golly I'm gonna sweat every stinkin' second of it!

It's frustrating to be at such a low starting point.  There was a time when I was doing 10 miles a day, or biking 20 miles, and working out 3 hours.  But that was before the two little ones came along.  One day I will be back there again.  This weight loss journey is a marathon, not a sprint.  I'm in it for the long haul.

Until next time....

32 Things I Hate About Being Fat

The last time I accomplished a major weight loss, it was nearly 6 years ago resulting in an 80 pound loss and me getting pregnant (after 10 years!)  One of the things I remember vividly toward the end of the journey was how quickly I forgot some aspects of being fat.  In the three months it took to lose the weight, I forgot some of the more truly morbid aspects of being obese. So this time around, I want to make sure to document those things, so that I won't forget.  And so I can use it as ammunition to keep me from gaining the weight back again...for whatever reason.

Susan's Epic Weight Loss
32 Things I Hate About Being Fat
This is me in April - Looking the NICEST I've looked in years.

Things I Hate About Being Fat

1. Not being able to climb a single flight of stairs without being winded.
2. Having my 4 year-old run faster than me.
3. Losing sensation in my arms and hands if I'm at a task for too long. The bigger I get, the worse it is.
4. Excruciating lower back pain when I walk for more than 5 minutes.
5. Being too self-conscious to wear a swim suit in public.
6. Not owning any full-length mirrors.
7. HATING to shop. Period.
8. My feet are too fat for regular shoes.
9. Being too self-conscious to eat (or work out) in public because I feel like everyone is judging me.
10. Feeling as if I don't deserve to be pampered and cared for. I'll 'earn it' when I get skinnier.
11. Being virtually invisible to strangers.
12. Being unable to play volleyball or hike - or any physical activity for that matter.
13. Rising from a sitting position on the floor is darned near impossible.
14. Having difficulty reaching my butt when I wipe.
15. The overhang of  my stomach.
16. Having a stomach that is bigger than my rather substantial boobs.
17. The double chin from hell.
18. Having difficulty tying my shoes.
19. Never wanting to have my picture taken.  Crying when I see my picture.
20. Realizing I've become just like my mother.
21. Wondering if my husband or children are ashamed of me.

22.  Avoiding places where I might meet old friends for fear they'll judge me for gaining so much weight since high school. 

23.    Plus sized clothing.  Ewwwww.

24.    Any shoes with more than 2 inch heels are too tall and hurt my feet

25.    Not going on rides or zip lining because I won't fit or weigh too much for the ride.

26.    $80 bras are the norm.

27.    My fingers are too fat for rings.

28.    Restaurant booths are a snug fit.

29.    My lap is almost too small for my son to sit on.

30.    Lingerie.  Yeah, not gonna happen.

31.    Neuropathy in my legs and feet.

32.    Being too embarrassed to dance.

...And the list goes on.  Be sure to come back.  I'm sure I'll add more as I consider this further.

Starting Point: Susan's Epic Weight Loss Measurements.

I should have done this sooner, but things became crazy around here.  Better late than never though, right?




OK, as of today, this is my Starting weight: 294.8 lbs (However, I started at 303.2 lbs)





















Fat: 55.8%
Water: 32.2 %

Neck: 16"
Bust: 49 1/4"
Arm: 16 3/4"
Waist: 50"
Lower Abs: 56"
Hips: 57"
Thigh: 24 3/4"
Calf: 17"

Pant Size: 24/26 Women
Shirt: 2XL
Shoes: Size 11 or 10 WW

I will try to add new pics and measurements every 10-20 lbs.  Let the games begin!!

Garcinia Cambogia - Another Supplement In My Coctail

I have long used Garcinia Cambogia when losing weight.  It has been my go-to supplement that seems to help off-set the days when my eating wasn't on pointe.  And on the days when I stick to my regimen the way I should, I notice more energy when I'm using this supplement.

I've used several brands of the years, some better than others.  So when I was given the opportunity to try Vidazen's supplement, I jumped.  I'd already tried their Colon Cleanse earlier and was impressed, so I wanted to see if their Carcinia Cambogia measured up as well.

Guess what?  It was better.  I'm am really impressed.  When I switched brands, I noticed a difference immediately.  I slept better and woke up faster, with more energy (which is saying a LOT because I only get 4-5 hours of sleep per night).

Admittedly, I'm no expert on Garcinia Cambogia.  But from a normal user's perspective, this is one product I would certainly recommend to anyone in the market.

Starting out With A Clean Slate

WARNING:  This blog may encroach the boundaries of TMI, but in an effort to stay true to the process, I'm going to spill the beans anyway!  Skip now, if you don't want to read further.

Part of my weight loss journey begins by starting with a clean slate.  That means I've enlisted the help of a colon cleanse.

During past weight loss programs, I've used some pretty great stuff - not specifically CALLED a colon cleanse, but supplements that were designed to do just that.  One of my favorites was alfalfa.

My problem, however, had always been the taste.  After a while, I could no longer stomach the taste and I created an aversion to the tasted, smell and texture of any alfalfa supplements.  Which was a shame, because they worked marvelously!

Be that as it may, if you can't swallow the stuff, it's worthless.  I tried the Vidazen version, which had alfalfa, but none of the taste.  It was awesome in that regard.  Plus, it wasn't anything overwhelming - as in, I-can't-leave-the-house-for-fear-that-a-catastrophe-may-happen, sort of overwhelming.

Needless to say, I was quite happy using this product as a stepping-off point, especially after this weekend, when my husband surprised me with a kitchen re-model, resulting in a whole-lot of fast food and not nearly enough healthy stuff.  This was the perfect way to offset a little bit of that naughtiness.

Adding Fish Oil To My Diet - Finally one I can stomach!

I've tried to take Fish oil off and on over the years for a variety of reasons. First off, I know that it's good for me. Secondly, I'm aware that I don't get enough of it in my diet because I'm the only one in my family who likes fish. And, since there are six of us, I'm out numbered.

 Fish oil has been connected to a variety of health benefits - anything from helping your periods, to obesity, to helping you gain weight, avoiding stroke, etc. For me, I was most interested in the prevention of stroke and heart disease because two of my children have congenital heart defects, my 19-year-old daughter had a TIA (mini-stroke) 6 months ago, and my father had a stroke when he was 55. Yeah, I'm not remotely interested in toying with any of that stuff. Anything I can do to keep my heart and blood healthy, I'm going to try. The problem I've had with fish oil in the past has been burping up the fish aftertaste. I could never last a day or two. But, when I had a chance to try a brand that promised no fish aftertastes, I was willing to give it a try.

It has totally lived up to its promises in my estimation.  I'm about a week into testing of this product and I'm very happy with it. For those who are interested, I found it on Amazon. The shipping was fast and the service good. I'm blogging about it because I'd recommend it. I hope you get the same out of it as I did!

 Suz

Rockin' some Kinesiology Tape

So one of the hardest parts about beginning a weight loss program is that everything HURTS!  A body my size is not designed to be running and doing high-impact sports.  In anticipation of all the aches and pains I'd had from my previous weight loss attempts, I ordered some Kinesiology kinesio tape.  

If you've never used kinesio tape, I would HIGHLY recommend the stuff.  No. Seriously.  It's unbelievable.  My daughter is a Division I athlete and was ranked #14 in the Junior Olympics for Hammer.  She also played varsity volleyball and worked like a beast.  She was the one who introduced me to kinesio tape  because she had it all over her body.

Kinesio tape for her rotator cuff

After a year of dubious observation, I found myself fighting shin splints and was willing to try anything to stop the pain.  I kid you not, the kinesio tape stopped the pain in MINUTES and kept the pain away for as long as I kept it on.

So, needless to say, when faced with working out again, I wasn't going to be without my kinesio tape again.

kinesio tape for patellar tendonitis

I got my roll in the mail last week through Amazon.  Before I could use it, my husband asked for some on his ankle to relieve some swelling.  So we went to YouTube, learned how to get rid of swelling on an ankle and I put it on.   Then today, he asked for something on his Achilles heel.  YouTube again, and viola! Happy husband.  My 6-year-old saw me working on 'daddy' and swiped some strips for herself and spend the rest of the evening with bright turquoise tape on her leg, but loved it.

My brand new Kinesiology kinesio tape in action!  It's a hit!

Needless to say, I've spent more time applying my tape to others than to myself, but if the others are any indicator, I'm sure it'll be fantastic.

Now...time to find a good hiding spot for my tape!

Why my weight loss will not be a priority in my life

So, I thought it might be a good idea to join Instagram.  I thought it would be fun to encourage others struggling with the same weight loss issues I am.  So far, all I've found are a bunch of very muscular, skinny people who probably spend more time in 1 day working on health and fitness than I do in a week.  Of course, that may be why they're all skinny and fit and I'm 150 lbs overweight.

That's great.  That's fine.  If that is your priority, I'm all for it.  It's an honorable endeavor.  However, before anyone judges me on how I go about this whole weight-loss thingy, I want you to spend a couple minutes in my shoes...or at least check out a typical day for me so that you'll understand WHY I do not plan on spending 3 hours a day on my health and fitness. But I WILL put it on my schedule and make sure I carve more time for it.

• 5:30 a.m. My 4-year-old son with Down syndrome wakes me up.  If I'm lucky, I can get him to lay with me till 6, but chances are, he's been up since 4:30, run through the house, torn everything to shreds, and finally came to me when there was nothing left to destroy and he was bored.  Don't worry - all dangerous items are locked safely away, and the house is locked up tight.  
• 6:00 a.m. I begin the arduous process of waking up my 15 year-old and my 6 year-old.  This process usually entails pounding on my teen's door 3 or 4 separate times, flipping his light switch on, threatening him with bodily harm, yelling, and occasionally laying on him until he surrenders and climbs out of bed.  Between visits to the teen, I must sing (yes, sing) my 6-year old awake to avoid any little-girl tantrums, help her find her clothes (because she is incapable of finding the outfit I laid directly next to her when I walked in the room), cook her breakfast, and make sure she eats it.  Then, I run after my 4 year-old trying to change his pull-up, and wrestle him into his clothes so that we can take said teenager to early-morning seminary. 
• 7:00 - Teen gets taken to seminary.  We pick up more kids for the Elementary school carpool, drop them (and my 6-year-old) off, then head home.
• 8:00 a.m.  I try to squeeze in a bite to eat while simultaneously running after my son who has climbed up onto the counter (or kitchen sink) and is now dumping any and all food the older kids left behind all over the floor or counter - or eating it himself.  Then, I try to convince him (I usually fail) to keep his clothes on while I spend the next several hours following behind him cleaning up mess after mess.  Finally around 10 a.m. I give up and let him go at it.  Screw it. I'll clean up his mess when he goes to pre-school (Don't judge me). 
• From 10:00 am - Noon: We work on his speech therapy, I try to squeeze in a little time returning e-mails and doing social media, he's fed, re-dressed for school, I make any phone calls needed for the day, etc. 
• 12:00 a.m. my son goes to school and I collapse into a heap on the couch.  I love the boy DEARLY but he is some serious work!  From 12 - 2 is when I race around like a maniac getting everything done that can't be accomplished with children in the house: dentist appointments, personal doctor's appointments, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, filling orders, last-minute work on any one of my websites, running errands, etc.  
• 2:00-4:00 the 6-year-old and the teen come home and we prep for evening.  Go through school work, check our schedule to see what is on tap for the evening, start dinner, last-minute cleaning, mow lawns/water grass and plants, etc.
• 4:00 - 7:00 is dinner prep & eating, activities for the kids, the 4 year-old comes home, and I field faxes for my part time job doing transcription work at home.
• 7:00 - 9:00 the evening bed-time ritual occurs for the little ones. 
• 9:00 - I work out
• 10:00 - 1:00 a.m. - I do my transcription work, followed by any other work that needs to be done on my business, websites, and writing my books.  At 1:00 I fall into bed and try to remember to breathe. 

With that said, I think I'm going to call it a night and go to bed an hour early.  Looking at my schedule for tomorrow already has me tired.  Whew!

Let the Epic Games Begin! First official Day of my Weight Loss

30 minutes on the treadmill feels like an hour on the trails!!

As of this morning (Sunday the 17th), I'm weighing in at 296.2, which is already a loss of 7.2 lbs.  But the weight lost up until this point has been due to sporatic attempts to be or eat healthier.  Today is what I would call my official "Day 1" because I'm journaling my food and working out. 

I like starting on Sundays because I don't eat out on Sundays, which forces me to eat healthy(er) and allows me a little more time to focus on myself before jumping head first into my week.

So just a couple quick heads-ups for those who either don't know me, or have never had this much weight to lose: 

1)  I have little or no filter.  I think filtering this experience gives a person a false sense of simplicity when it comes to losing weight of this proportion and to leave out the undesirable components of my weight for the sake of the 'eww' or 'TMI' responses keeps those who are struggling with the same issues as I am from feeling isolated because they won't identify completely with my experience.  So, for those who are faint of heart, be warned.  And if you find a particular post disturbing I'll tell you a secret:  You can delete it!  I'll never know and nobody will tell.  Just come back the next day to when things are normal :)

This is what I concentrate on while I'm on the treadmill.  Hundreds of motivational quotes!

2) I can get a little hard core at times.  I have an all-or-nothing personality. This means that in order for me to successfully lose 160 lbs I will need to be 100% all of the time.  I cannot fudge.  Not working out even ONCE will cause me to fail.  This is a personality flaw.  I understand this.  And it has taken me years to come to grips with it.  If you are NOT all-or-nothing, that's OK.  But this is who I am.  Thus, there will be lots of posts on some days because I tend to obsess on occasion to stay focused on the end goal. 

3) I will NOT be following any specific diet.  They are too restrictive.  However, I can say that of the weight loss programs I have used (and I've used nearly all of them), I will probably adhere closest to the 6-week-body makeover, which is what I was using 6 years ago when I lost 80 pounds.  I would have succeeded in that program if I hadn't gotten pregnant half way through and forced to stop.  

I am not following any specific diet, but am instead choosing to take bits and pieces that have worked for me and incorporating them all into a method that I will be able to maintain indefinitely.  The problem with diets is that they are temporary.  I am looking for a way of living that will be permanent.  Nothing less.  I have NO intention of regaining this weight back. Ever. 

4) I will be eating a LOT.  Why? Because it requires a lot of food to maintain a body this size.  So, a normal person might be on a 12-1500 calorie diet to lose 2 lbs a week.  Me?  I'm on an 1800+ calorie diet and I'll be losing nearly a pound a DAY.  Never fear, though.  The smaller I get, the less I'll be eating - in spite of the increased exercise.

Starting my Journey of a 160 pound weight loss TODAY...OK I started a week ago.

Did you miss me? I missed you.  I missed the time I spent working out, feeling great, and losing weight.  

What happened to me, you ask?  Well it's simple really.  My daughter got sick.  No, not cough cough sick.  More like, You've got a giant hole in your heart and you're going to stroke-out and die so you'd better get that fixed kind of sick.  Yeah.  So losing weight got derailed for about 4 or 5 months until she had her surgery.

  During that time I had several epiphanies (I'll leave those stories for later).  But most importantly, I realized that the crap is ALWAYS going to be hitting the fan for me.  And I'm ALWAYS going to be busy.  So, it's time to suck it up and get to work.  Nothing will change unless I make it change and make my health a priority. 

In the mean time, I'll give you an update and my new starting point.  This picture is my most recent of me - at 300 lbs.  Yep.  I finally broke that blasted barrier (and cried).  I see so much of my mother in me now (again, a story for another time) and I don't want to be my mother.  At least not in the weight department. 

 Now, I have close to 160 lbs to lose.  Believe you me.  I know how next to impossible that sounds.  But I also know what I'm made of.  And I know what this journey is going to require in order to be successful.  And I'm up for the challenge.  And the humiliation (I'll be posting VIDEOS this time!) 

Needless to say, stay in touch.  My baby is better, and I'm back on track. I've already lost 6 lbs (I started a week ago - seriously).  So now, it's time to document the crap out of my journey.  I hope someone gets something out of my weight loss journey.  Even if it IS just me.


Yep. This is gonna be EPIC!