Man, that was a quick diet.

Alright, here's the update:

6/7:  10 points
6/8:  6 points
6/9:  5 points

Well that attempt lasted a good 3 days.  I'm not gonna lie:  that's longer than usual.  And guess what, it only took me 11 days for me to hop back on.  That is MUCH better than normal.

Warning:  If you are here only for lighthearted posts full of laughter and fun, skip the next section.

---------BEWARE!!-----------BEWARE!!--------BEWARE!!! ------------ BEWARE!!! --------------

I usually get into a spiral of shame and disgust at myself that I can't even control myself for more than a couple of days - if that.  We're lucky if my stamina for healthy eating lasts more than a meal.  "Why even try?" I ask myself.  "You're just going to fail.  You hate vegetables, and that'll never change.  You love chocolate, and that will NEVER change.  Are you really ready to live a life without joy and sugar satisfaction?  They are such a part of your life and have been since infancy, there's no way you can adjust your taste buds."  And on and on and on and on.  A wise man once said that one of Satan's favorite phrases is that it's not worth it to try to be better again.  You've screwed up too many times, and repentance isn't possible anymore.  And really, isn't that what I'm doing?  I'm repenting of the abuse I've given my body all these years by overeating and eating poorly.

--------IT'S SAFE NOW ---------- IT'S SAFE NOW -------------- IT'S SAFE NOW----------------

So I'm back in the saddle again!  Except that I'm afraid of horses.  Huh - that's probably a pretty apt analogy, then.  I'm gonna get bucked again, I KNOW IT.  But I'll dust the dirt off my fat-girl exercise pants and hop back on again.  So here we go:

6/20:  11 points!

10 points for this Hufflepuff!

Hysterectomy.  We laugh and joke about it when we're on our periods.  Hysterectomy.  Just cut it out and get rid of it all!  I'll be happy never going through this again! Hysterectomy.  I'm 36 and am looking forward to my youngest being out of school in 8 years.  Hysterectomy.  I'm not using it, so why keep it?  Hysterectomy.  That's my option, or deal with what has now been a 9-month heavy period.

When faced with that reality, I look back and ask myself when was the last time I was really regular, and it was when I was training for a sprint triathlon.  I was taking care of my body.  In the two years since the triathlon, I've gone jogging a handful of times, biking once, and swimming never.  The motivation of finishing it was gone, and I was quickly able to convince myself I had better things to do.

Well, I have a new motivation:  keep my uterus.

But I'm going to work on a more whole-person approach.  I tend to focus on one thing really hard and everything else goes out the window.  I don't have time for 2 hours of jogging and biking and swimming a night, but I can work on doing a bunch of little, easy things that improve many facets of my life.

I'm the chubby one in the picture - but I still finished
a sprint traithlon!

So I've made a list of things I really need to work on doing better.  They are a whole bunch of little things that I really should be doing every day, but I don't.  Anyone who knows me knows I'm a points oriented person, so I'm giving myself points for each item I do.  Right now I have a possibility of 12 points a day.  I really don't anticipate myself getting those 12 points each day.  That is nearly impossible with my crazy schedule, but I should be pretty decent.  So here's my list:

• pray/meditate
• personal scripture Study
• exercise
• brush teeth
• eat veggies/fruit
• no fast food/restaurants
• journal my food intake
• read to kids
• 7 hours of sleep
• take my meds
• wash face
• Drink .5 ounces of water per pound I weight (wow, that's a lot to drink right now!)

There are sooo many more I could add to this list.  I could be more strict, and/or more specific. But these are the simple things I can do each day to improve my whole self that gives me that "Check!" feeling of success.  Some days I'll get two points, but today I got 10 points!  Yea!  I envision the list morphing and growing as I get better or find more things I need to improve on.  But I'm a 10 points ahead today!

- Cathy